Want to be Happier? Start with Your Face.
(And keep the botox needle away from those crows feet!)
You heard me…
KEEP the crows feet.
In fact, show them off – they’re a key contributor to your overall happiness.
I’ve often been told that I must be really happy, because I’m smiling all the time. (By everyone except my daughter that is, who has been known to say, "Mom, stop smiling at everyone – it’s creepy.")
In truth, I am pretty happy person.
And here’s the thing that many people don’t get. I’m usually not smiling because I’m happy – I’m happy because I’m usually smiling.
You’ve heard about resting b*tch face? It’s likely that those women feel significantly less happy than I do simply because of their expression.
And there’s science – a lot of it – to back it up.
Over the years, numerous studies have shown that targeting frown lines with botox reduces the incidence of depression. A few recent studies have taken it even further by flipping the hypothesis and investigating what happens when it’s the laughter lines - officially called Duchenne lines – (AKA crows feet) that are targeted.
You guessed it.
People felt less happy.
Humans relate to one another in part by reading one another’s faces – even the tiniest frown or smile tells us how to respond to a person in ways that we’re not even aware of. Those Duchenne lines are the way that instinctively know that a smile is sincere. When a person’s smile doesn’t reach their eyes, our emotional brain says "watch out" or "untrustworthy."
Our embodied emotions also affect the way we feel on the inside.
When people are asked to smile while they watch a cartoon, they report that the cartoon was funnier than if they weren’t asked to smile. People asked to wrinkle their noses reported higher levels of disgust and those asked to frown were far more likely to react negatively to the images that were shown to them.
What does this mean for you?
Your facial expressions are neurological triggers. Smile and you will feel happier, frown and you will feel sadder, narrow your eyes or thrust your lower jaw and you’ll feel angrier.
This Week: Rock the Crows Feet!
When you’re feeling anxious, overwhelmed, or just a little angsty…
Take a moment to clear your head. In order to do this exercise, you’ll need to be present. Pause whatever you’re doing and take a few deep breaths. Focus your attention solely on your breath – let your exhale soften the muscles of your back, shoulders, neck, and jaw.
Now, one at a time, think about the things you "have to" do.
Change the language from "I have to do" x to "I choose to do x because." HINT: the because must be something you want, not something you don’t want. For many things this is enough to shift your energy.
For example: "I have to cook dinner," becomes "I choose to cook dinner because I value time at the table with my family."
Or "I have to re-do my deck for the Board presentation" becomes "I choose to create a new deck because I like being a respected authority in my department."
Occasionally, however, it’s difficult to find an I choose to statement that feels right or that is not in some way fear based. When that happens, try some I choose not to statements.
It may be time to take that item off your list or begin to initiate a change in that area of your life.