SENIOR MOMENT
I just got off the phone with my dad. He’s 79.
He was telling me about replacing a part in his washing machine – one of those things in an awkward spot that you have to do by feel.
“I was trying like hell to loosen it, but it kept getting tighter,” he said.
He went on, laughing, “I thought, crap, I really am slipping if I can’t even remember the direction a bolt is threaded, but it turned out that the damn thing was in there backward!”
Good lord.
I’d called him just in time.
I’ve been reading Becca Levy’s book, Breaking the Age Code.
Her research appears to prove that our beliefs on aging can alter our actual lifespan by an astonishing 7.5 years.
My dad’s implicit bias – that “we start to slip as we get older” – completely altered the way he saw his situation.
“If the same thing had happened to you at 40, you would have automatically assumed that the washer was a piece of shit,” I reminded him – fully remembering hammers flying across the garage followed by chains of murmured expletives.
Only this time, he had jumped to the incorrect conclusion that the problem was him being old.
“I’ll be damned,” he said, “you’re right about that!”
None of us thinks we’re ageist…
That’s the insidious thing about implicit bias – you have no idea that it’s there, tripping you up behind the scenes.
In the past week, I admit to having attributed each of these to being over 50…
Repeatedly couldn’t remember who wrote Breaking the Age Code
Waking up with an aching back
Tripped on a walk and skin my knee
In retrospect, here’s my reality…
I’ve never paid attention to names. There, I said it.
It’s honestly time for a new mattress.
My knees are patterned with scars from a lifetime of wipe outs. I just don’t look where I’m going.
If you think you may have some implicit ageist biases – and if you grew up in the US, it’s likely that you do – try Becca Levy’s assessment…
Think “old person”
Write down the 1st 5 words that pop into your mind. (Don’t filter yourself.)
How many of those words are negative?
If some (or all) are negatives – don’t dismay. You can shift what you believe and in doing so, shift your outcomes.
Start looking for examples of older people who are mentally sharp, physically fit, curious, engaged, connected and happy.
They’re all around you.
By finding evidence that there are outcomes other than the ones you perceive as inevitable you’ll shift both your conscious and unconscious beliefs and literally alter the trajectory of your life.
How cool is that?